I just want to live

I just want to live.
   
   "They say it is a matter of time, a thousand days and the sun won't shine".... Those lyrics from Tom Rosenthal's Go solo, were piercing my soul before my heart was pierced by a bullet.
     I was not a criminal neither was I a saint, I was just a struggling sinner. An average Nigerian boy with an empty pocket and a bag of dreams. My plan was never to die. I joined the protest to demand for a right to live, I guess that was my crime. I was not even carrying a placard mine was simply written in my heart, " I just want to live ". I have never felt the excitement of living till this moment, it's very ironic how death could bring my taste bud to life and now I can encounter the tastefulness of life only but when I had lost it.
     I wish I could just admit that I am a Coward and have my life back. For me Nigeria is too big a country to die for, If I  would get to die for something let it be my self conviction. So yes, I am no hero, I am afraid of death. The pain that came with the stray bullet that hit my heart left me thinking that death would be much better than this intense pain. Now that I am dead, I would give anything just to go back to that intense pain. Cause I had not lived, I had merely survived till now. Unlike Diego Maradona, I do not have a son that would promise me to take care of my grandson that I had bonded with, I do not have a  Napoli willing to rename their stadium for me. Unlike Bob Marley, my last words can't be "money can't buy life". Unlike Buddha, I don't not have followers that I would leave with this last advice  "decay is inherent in all compound things, work out your salvation with diligence"..... I am not delusional to think that my life achievement could have ever gotten close to these men's. But I rather try,  than be another dead kid that became popular for being unpopular. 
    I just wanted one thing,  TO LIVE!!.....O well, till we meet again, accept my olive branch.

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